Monday, November 28, 2011

God is the Gift this Thanksgiving

Ephesians 5:20
20 always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.

This is to ponder.............shouldn't everyday be Thanksgiving?
As I prepared to host Thanksgiving at my house with the changing of sheets, the scrubbing of bathrooms, the cleaning out refrigerators, tripping over dogs toys, the kids screaming their hungry, husband asking me questions.............  my head was spinning me a bit disoriented....................but isn't that the time to give thanks?
Life is pounding hard against me.........a test........not enough hours in the day.
I grab hold of the vacuum cleaner in front of me and it is resentment that traps me.
Four tweens.............17, 16, 14 and 12............who don't lift a finger.
Where is my gratitude? In this mundane living of this race we call life.

Jeremiah 29:11

11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Even in the ordinary days of our life..................He has plans for us!

I set out their journals again............encouraging the tweens to join in.
We have to train them to leave their mark of gratitude.

Proverbs 22:6
 Start children off on the way they should go,
and even when they are old they will not turn from it.

When we give thanks in everything the good the bad and the ugly..... it turns our eyes towards the King. Being changed is the name of the game. Transformation of the heart is what we need! 
I ask myself today........."couldn't everyday be Thanksgiving?"

I scurry to find my gratitude journal.........why did I lose my way?
I start by reading from my gratitude list and water swells within my soon we forget to be Thankful in the everyday!
Help us Lord to see through your and everyday.

I stick to the Kitchen floor as I walk past.........(freshly mopped an hour ago) is then that I see the red kool-aid dripping from the frig. Yes I will give thanks that we have kool-aid to drink.
I smile as I wipe up the mess.

Thankfulness should be the very breath that we take.

It is then that I notice that there is blood on the floor from the 16 year old dog.
I murmur it quietly........"please Lord, not now........don't let him die with all my family coming today."

Why do I give thanks only in the good times?  Is it; "Selective Faith?"
I rub my hand across the 16 year old dog............and my heart tears. I start the flood of memories from the past. Just a few more days Lord, please.

Why do I "the taker," only hold my hand out to accept the good?
And it's me who prays to be more godly.
And so from this day forward I am making a restart my gratitude journal because....."giving thanks in all things paves the road to giddy grace!"

In thanking God for everything that happens to you or to me.......deep wounds begin to heal and gratitude turns this life into blessings.  Joy finds it's way into your life after all happiness is only circumstantial. But true Joy is from the Lord.
 So move over and let God work His miracles and watch Him turn sorrow into joy.

Through life the heart will continue to ache...........but the ache of the past is eased over and over again by giving THANKS to him in all things!

Thank you Jesus;

for a family who drives to spend thanksgiving with us
for the extra dogs every family brought (all of them around 100 pounds!)
For the peaceful passing of our sweet precious hound.
For advent that is right around the corner
For a pastor who teaches us what absolute surrender really is
For all the help in the kitchen from; my mom and sister-n-law
For nieces and nephews who love
praise and worship at church
 finding our gratitude journals
2 turkeys (deep fried)
praying as a family
the lab who lays at my feet in the wee hours of the morning while praying
clean sheets for everyone
brownies in the oven

all of grace,

Friday, November 25, 2011

Thanks- Giving

Do we really " Give Thanks on Thanksgiving"?
Oh how easy it is to be thankful when everything is going " our way". However..... when life gets hard- we find it harder to be thankful.
Do we have a thankful attitude towards God when times are hard? When we are hurting... In those times we need to stop... and pray for a thankful heart.
Ask God to help you to understand  his love and his plans for your life.

A Thanksgiving Day Prayer.....

Lord, so often times, as any other day
When we sit down to our meal and pray

We hurry along and make fast the blessing
Thanks, amen. Now please pass the dressing

We are slaves to the olfactory overload
We must rush our prayer before the food gets cold

But Lord, I'd like to take a few minutes more
To really give Thanks to what I am Thankful for....

Even though my family often drives me crazy- I am thankful this year, that we made it through this year with the safety and health of my kids, husband, parents, and rest. Thank  you father for all you do- to protect me and my family. We have no idea the daily battles that go on all around us.
This year I want to be different-
Father - grant me a kind, gentle and thankful heart.

Monday, November 21, 2011


Hebrews 12:1;
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.

Why is it so hard to run this race called, "life," with perseverance?  Is it my fear of suffering? Or my refusal to suffer?

For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows. (2 Corinthians 1:5)

But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed.(1 Peter 4:13)
Perhaps my greatest sin is not surrendering my all?
Surrendering........... a powerful word...............meaning wreck-less abandonment to the King.

He was reclining on the floor eating as it was customary in those days...........a women worked her way through the crowd in the Pharisee's house............. she stood behind him weeping...........for her sins were many....................her tears begin to fall like a river that runs through............. raining down upon his feet. She in the most intimate surrender of all broke her most valuable possession and poured it out on His feet.

She had nothing to wipe his feet with. It was the truest surrender of all.......... without caring what one thought of her.............she reached up and dropped her hair down and began wiping his feet with her hair..............and kissing his feet over and over again. (a women's hair was the most intimate thing she owned back then) Completely She recklessly abandoned all. (Luke 7: 36-50)

Her FAITH............. Her love!

I whisper Jesus' words.....“Your faith has saved you; go in peace.” Wanting this to be my very own heart beat.....His words to flow through my veins.
It's a new willing to abandon your all. I am quiet this morning before dawn..........I close my eyes and say it out loud.............visualizing that I am waving a white flag....and I murmur it softly......"I surrender."

My heart will be your altar.

all of grace,

Friday, November 18, 2011

All of grace

The quieter you are the more his grace can evade your life. The world we live in deafens us with it's endless noise.

May this weekend be one of sitting in silence for a moment in time.
Silence can sometimes awaken our very own soul.

There is a time to listen and a time to speak. We are always listening to something............but are we really hearing?

All of grace,

Thursday, November 17, 2011


Jeremiah 17:7-9

7But blessed is the one who trusts in the LORD,
whose confidence is in him.
8 They will be like a tree planted by the water
that sends out its roots by the stream.
It does not fear when heat comes;
its leaves are always green.
It has no worries in a year of drought
and never fails to bear fruit.”

9 The heart is deceitful above all things
and beyond cure.
Who can understand it?

all is grace,

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

When your ready to flee from yourself

Is Thanksgiving really almost here?  It has happened so unexpected.............the leaves falling from the trees all changed.....Life continues to be a gift but I can't seem to escape from the "self."
It's my exaggerated sense of self that keeps me putting my schedule ahead of the King.
But remaining empty and craving fullness.

   I am starving my very own soul from the eternal's where the darkness and disobedience go hand and hand. Who am I really I scream?  Me the wretched woman and mama.............who is the want a be Christian. With my hand held out being a taker always the taker........and then it's grace that whispers.......come, take..........receive GRACE...........from the one where atonement comes. Our blessings are secure in Him.................He is faithful even when we are faithless.

Jesus is the road less traveled where you will find His mercy and truth meeting together.
 Righteousness and peace are entwined together and upon all of that sits:   "The Throne of Grace."

Our God gave up His throne to put on like ours.......he became walk humble............but HOW do I follow in His footsteps.............humble? Me who claims to know my God!

Why do I make an effort to avoid people who hurt and not make an effort to love those who hurt me?
PRIDE............seems to rear it's ugly head over and over again.  I am no better than a Pharisee!
It's a daily battle............and it's my very own SOUL that's at stake.

And if it's me that claims to know God better than others..........then it's me that is feeling like I am the better............and that's not God at all that I am following!

Praying for the living waters to flow through me..........But how? Sometimes I want to give up........surrender from the life of Faith. It seems like "pipe dreams," impossible to reach.

The road less traveled gets steeper and steeper winding you deeper and deeper until you feel you just can't go on............and just when you think you can't make it another step..............  the glory of the resurrection descends upon you and the false sense of self begins to fade. It's the revelation of who God really is that starts to surface.  It happens when I stop holding out my hand for the taking and start
 following......... in His humble footsteps.
So how do I walk before him blameless? up and allowing Almighty God Incarnate to work in us and through us.

Our human relationships are the very conditions in which the glory of God should be exhibited!
Love more...........Forgive more..........walk balmelessly before the Lord.

Genesis 17:1-2 “Walk Before Me, And Be Blameless”

all of grace,

Monday, November 14, 2011

Ongoing Project

I remember a song- one that I sung when I was little.....
"He's still working on me- to make me what I ought to be
It took him just a week to make the moon and stars- the sun and the
earth and Jupiter and Mars.
how loving and patient he must be- 'cause he is still working on me".
Loving and Patient are two qualities I want.
I pray- before my feet hit the ground- "Father- change me- make me into someone you can use."

I listen to the boys upstairs- playing. No TV or Computers tonight. Just the three of them- trying to entertain themselves for a few hours. I hold my breath- 'cause it is a matter of time before the fighting and whining begins.
Please Father- help them see what you would have them see.

My boys are apart of the next generation. How can I help them? How can they make a difference in the world?
We watched- (you-tube) boys and girls from all over the world open "shoe boxes" filled with toys. I want to teach them compassion- a "want" inside of them- a want to help others.
This video is about kids helping kids.
What a great start - to teach your kids about compassion! -
It starts with a shoe box- a few gifts- a letter. Send it across the world to make
a small difference.
A small jester of kindness- a small example of compassion. I hope to spark an
interest- an interest for others.
They watch me- the boys do- they watch my actions and behaviors.
We went to McDonalds tonight- a quick fix for dinner.
I had a quiet nudge- to pay for the car behind me- something the radio station I listen too has been doing for a few years now. This was the first time- I didn't have "the note" that explains what and why. I just did.....
behind me was a police car
I paid for his dinner- he pulled up to my car and asked "WHY"....
Because- I said- I just wanted to thank you for your service.
My kids were so excited- My middle son- Josh
said- " Mom- that made me feel good inside". Me too- I said.
Hey boys- lets make a difference in someones life tomorrow- Kind deeds can be free. At school see how you can "make a difference" or show "kindness".
They all agreed and are excited for tomorrow's mission.
It just takes a minute- to show kindness.... and it sure feels good.
With a Thankful Heart...

Saturday, November 12, 2011

What you love

What we love is what we become!
And what we become is what we model...........................................and what we model is what we will pass on to our children.............."What is your legacy that you are leaving behind?"
Are your desires shaping you? Are my desires shaping me?
Me a wretched woman..........straddling the fence with one leg in the spiritual realm= eternal............and the other leg in the world= temporary!
We are only passing through this is not our home. We are here for just a season!
But our season here will determine our resume for our eternity!

May your weekend be one of reconstructing your is the most important resume you will ever write because it is for eternity!

My prayer I read this morning before dawn:

O eternal God, though Thou art not such as I can see with my eyes or touch with my hands, yet grant me this day a clear conviction of Thy reality and power. Let me not go forth to my work believing only in the world of sense and time, but give me grace to understand the world I cannot see or touch is the most real world of all. My life today will be lived in time but ETERNAL issues will be concerned in it. The needs of my body will be clamant, but it is for the needs of my soul that I must care most. My business will be with things material, but behind them let me be aware of things spiritual. Let me keep steadily in mind that the things that matter are not money or possessions, not house of lands, not bodily comfort or bodily pleasure; but truth and honour and meekness and helpfulness and a pure love of Thyself.

For the power Thou hast given me to lay hold of things unseen:
For the strong sense I have that this is not my home:
For my restless heart which nothing finite can satisfy:
I give Thee thanks, O God.
For invasion of my soul by Thy Holy Spirit:
For all human love and goodness that speak to me of Thee:
For the fullness of Thy glory outpoured in Jesus Christ:
I give Thee thanks, O God.

I, a pilgrim of eternity, stand before Thee, O eternal One. Let me not seek to deaden or destroy the desire for Thee that disturbs my heart. Let me rather yield myself to its constraint and go where it leads me. Make me wise to see all things today under the form of eternity, and make me brave to face all the changes in my life which such a vision may entail:  through the grace of  Christ my Saviour.

A Dairy of Private Prayer:  by John Baillie

all of grace,

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Door to Door

They always come the unexpected.................and it's me who screams...........who am I the woman with the unclean lips......who lives my life like I am the centered.
Letting my emotions guide me............. like I can handle it ...........after all I am the one anchored in God's word.

Isaiah 6:5-6

5Woe to me!” I cried. “I am ruined! For I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips, and my eyes have seen the King, the LORD Almighty.”
6 Then one of the seraphim flew to me with a live coal in his hand, which he had taken with tongs from the altar.

It looked like a comedy show somehow as I stumbled and mumbled to answer their questions about the Trinity............ They twisted and turned even my thoughts and I felt myself hot under breath wanting to run as fast as I could to the Saviour's arms. As their words fell my throat lumped...........and I said "JESUS," where are you? They explained that the "Trinity," was built by pagan's back in the day............ Are you kidding me? I gasped as I tried to hang on..........I felt my world spin..........and then it was me who was the confused!

24 For false messiahs and false prophets will appear and perform great signs and wonders to deceive, if possible, even the elect.
Matthew 24:24

They handed me a little book and told me that "Jesus," sent them my way to help me understand the bible.......................... the bible is so confusing and difficult............."let us help you!"

I murmured it softly........."I don't think I need help understanding the Bible...........I have the Holy Spirit living in me.

1 John 2:27

27 As for you, the anointing you received from him remains in you, and you do not need anyone to teach you. But as his anointing teaches you about all things and as that anointing is real, not counterfeit—just as it has taught you, remain in him.

Something in me deep realized how fragile we really are and I simply cracked wide open as the water started to fall. I felt shredded........with bits of fragments of me sweeping away.
"What if I am wrong and they are right?"  I am not as closely identified with Christ as I thought.

After they leave it is me who falls right down on my knees and pleads for the Lord to show me is then with the WORD Himself that I truly start to see. The scales begin to fall and they continue to fall for weeks. I break out of darkness...........the truth is revealed by the light. They had one thing right; they were sent by Jesus himself but for a different reason:  For the collapse of my the SURRENDERING of my life to the SUPREMACY of the LORD JESUS.

     God can only bring us to the point but........ he can't push us through it.
He is breaking my outer layer of my individual INDEPENDENCE!  He is and I............Do we want it
The dying to self our false sense of self........... so that we may become one with HimOneness with the Father! I must stop relying on me, me, me........and not following the ideas of man...........but the utmost loyalty to Him.  If we get to this point there will be no confusion.

Proverbs 3:5;
Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding

Colossians 2:8;
See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy, which depends on human tradition and the basic principles of this world rather than on Christ.

     He who died for me is breaking my independence..........Everything else is just me being a "want a be"= "Religious Fraud."  I must be broken from myself......and when that happens supernatural power will come my way and the witness of the SPIRIT OF GOD will be UNMISTAKABLE.  I will be truly CRUCIFIED with CHRIST!

He is gathering brokens fragments of me..........and of you.......placing them back together like a beautiful piece of Mosaic art- a patchwork of people, places, times, and cultures- that depicts ONE person;  JESUS CHRIST! A flash of recognition has transformed my life as the world whirls and we spin important it is to see............that the body of Christ is much bigger than the small pieces we experience in our everyday lives.

Galatians 2:20

20 I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.

The salvation that comes from God is not based on human logic........but on the sacrificial death of Jesus Christ.

all of grace,

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Worthy is the Lamb

Psalms 51:10
"Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me."
Psalms 51:12
"Grant me a willing spirit"

Ecclesiastes 5
" Guard your steps"
"Do not be quick with your mouth, do not be hasty in your heart to utter anything before God."
"God is in heaven and you are on earth, so let your words be few."

I remember several times growing up- during a hard time- I needed God. I did not realize it then, but my spirit longed for God. I would open my bible and look at the pages. I looked at the words, but I didn't really read any of it. I would flip through the pages and eventually find the shortest chapter and grab a few words off the page- trying to get full. Just as easy as I opened the bible, I closed it. Well I tried, I thought. Maybe I did feel better after reading. I grew up in a Christian home. I knew how to pray, and I knew that if I needed God- that he was always there. But what did I give back to God- nothing. I went to church every time the doors were open- cause I had too. I participated in devotions - because I had too. I prayed because- I had too. If it did not benefit me- I didn't do it. I faked the part of a Christian girl. I went to church willingly- cause I liked a boy in my Sunday School class. 
Now grown up- I realize how blessed I was- how blessed I am.
God protected me all those years- he protects me now.
I open the bible now, and every word touches me- grabs me and wont let go.
How can I read his word, and still fail- still sin- still fall.
I have wasted so much time- time that I could have spent building his kingdom, but too busy worrying about me, or things that concern me.

How mighty is our God. How patient is our God. How blessed are we that proclaim his name.
He is so worthy to be praised. I will lift up his name.

As I tucked in my boys tonight- I thanked God- Thanked him for an uneventful day. One with no injuries- bad notes from school- trouble with friends.
Did I make a difference today in someones life? Did someone see Jesus in me.
I don't know.
I met a women at the nail salon- her husband was in the unit where I worked recently. Did I make a difference in her life- letting her see Jesus in me?
I helped one of the teachers today. Did I share Jesus with her? Or did I watch the clock and pray that the time on the clock would speed up.
Why is it so hard, to share what I know- what I learn in my daily bible reading.
Am I too busy- I sometimes cram bible reading in- like I am reading cliff notes before a book report. Just give me the basics- just to pass the test.
Is that what I want to do- just enough to get into heaven- as long as I am there right?
That thought stings my soul.
I have so much and I give so little.

Father- Give me a glance with your eyes- let me see what you see. How you could come to earth, just because- just because you loved me first.
Let me show your love through my actions and words. Let my words be few, but my actions be many for you.
And let your name be praised.
I want to be an awesome fruit bearing branch,

Monday, November 7, 2011

The Vine- John 15

5 “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing. (John 15:5)


Do you ever wonder if you are bearing fruit when your dishes are piled the high and the laundry is never done?  It's ground-hog day once again for me!

It's then that I wonder if I am truly connected..................It's simple really the branch grows out of the lives there and has no responsibility except to RECEIVE the sap and nourishment from the root and stem.

It is days like these that seem so repetitive that I ask myself; "Am I really connected?"
If the sap is being received there will be fruit.  If there is no sap then there is NO CONNECTION! 

As I glide up the stairs to the tornado of the teens rooms..... I wonder if I will really miss this? Miss the emptying of the trash...........the making of beds..........the laundry that is never done.  Maybe it is me who is not the crucified with Christ!
Do I really want to be?   Who wants to stay the broken?
But HE has ordered our steps? So what have I sold my life out too?  Is it thingsA cleaner house?
Jesus poured the truth of God's word into his disciples...................and He sent the Holy Spirit from the Father. He was telling them how to stay connected.  Why is the flesh so strong? It is all out war-fare.
Do I really want to be connected?

There are 3 stages of fruit bearing:

1)  In stage one you are connected and are receiving sap but not fruit bearing like you should.
This is where 60-70 percent of all Christians stay!!!
This is also where you feed your even feel at times that something your doing is not right but you do it anyway....By your sin many are defiled.  The rebuking starts in this stage as well:

Hebrews 12: 5-6
My son, do not make light of the Lord’s discipline,
and do not lose heart when he rebukes you,
6 because the Lord disciplines the one he loves,
and he chastens everyone he accepts as his son.”[a]

There is conviction in this stage and you may even stop for a while but discouragement rears it's ugly head.....and it's a cycle that never seems to end.

2)  In stage 2 is where the pruning happens....Testing can even become intense. Trails are brought your way by God himself as He does the pruning. He starts to cut away the temporal things in your life. He wants the eternal views instilled. He is saying:  "worship only me!"

Deuteronomy 5:7-8;

7 “You shall have no other gods before[a] me.
8 “You shall not make for yourself an image in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below.

Your habits you have developed over the years determine now determine your priorities.....You come to a fork in the road.......... which path will you take?  The eternal or the temporal?

This is where most Christians that have made it to this stage turn and run back to stage 1.  This is where we need to pray for God to plant our feet on solid ground!!! To remain before him BROKEN!
If you hang on this is where He will bring you out of the firey furnace as His Trophy of Grace!

19 The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; 20 idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions 21 and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God. (Galatians 5: 19-21)

God is telling us to let go of our baggage!!! Sometimes I feel like I treasure my sin! I don't want to let go.

3) The last stage is all about the Savior. This is about you running to His arms and Him being FIRST in your life. This is about you being and not about doing!
This is where you finally SURRENDER!  Setting ourselves apart........guarding our hearts and our minds at all times.....with the eternal view in mind at all times! Most Christians will never experience the gift........of such PEACE.  This is where He gives us what we need...........not what we want!

Set today apart from other days...........say it out loud:  ABSOLUTE SURRENDER to you Lord is what I have choose!

God is trying to get our attention!!!

Let your surrender to Christ be absolute. Cry out!!! Time is short!

all of grace,

so thankful to God for:

the opportunity to be broken
crumbs on the floor
clogged toilets again
sun glistening through the trees
leaves changing colors
a pastor that teaches the word
friends that show up unexpected to visit your church
long talks after church with the teens
an extra hour of sleep

Saturday, November 5, 2011

Weekends are made for light

All of grace is because Jesus is our all in all, and His grace is is the eternal light that gives us the very breath we breath! There is no life like the one lived in the light of Christ.

May your weekend be one of
walking in the light........thinking only of the eternal instead of the temporal

When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, "I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life." (John 8:12)

all of grace,
the Yahweh Sisters