Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Words...................................

 Wretched mama that I am................the words........oh how the words change everything




Romans 7: 19-20
 For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. 20 Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.


What should I do? Me the one with the unclean lips? I speak the words the kind that pierce their hearts....the kind that changes them, destroys them tears them down....
     Where are the gracious words that edify? Eph. 4:29
I keep revisiting of the old words the ones where I hurt others.......
After the words fly off the tongue that whips it out quick.......it's then that the head lowers and I realize what I have done............the tears start the sting.........the sting that pierces me the deep..........
it all started out so good.......so godly and then there it was the report card of the sixteen year old.........
I keep saying under my breath, speak the words of life..........the words of grace..........the words of love.........the words that heal...........the words of peace....
then I see it the grades all in a row..............the begs and pleas of the empty promises of  "I will do better next time," it is then that I lose it...........the tongue whips and spins out of control and that woman-child of mine hangs the head low.............where is my gratitude?

 Proverbs 12:18; tells us to think before we speak...........


But what I really need is a new heart.........a transplant........the kind that only the great physician can give..
the one that makes the heart pump you pure full of grace...........
Luke 6:45; "out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks.....
Word problems are heart problems.....the need for God's saving grace is so evident...... He can create in us a new heart that produce words that honor him and comfort those who hear.....
Our words have been entrusted to us by the father........so why is it I do what I don't want to do?
God has holy standards for how we are to speak....
God's redeeming love is what saves us.........saves us from ourselves......when we start to worship Him with gratitude no matter what our circumstances are then and only then do we break the chains of bondage....bondage that has the words that ensare us so deeply to the pit...........the pit of ingratitude..........
and later that night when I calm down it is then that I take this woman-child into my arms and whisper the sorry over and over again............place her precious face into my hands and kiss her cheek as if I can take back the everything................confessing so humbly that I am my greatest communication problem.....I am my own worst enemy...........turning on myself with my tongue..............
the woman-child looks up at me with blood shot eyes from tears............and smiles the smile of forgiveness
all of grace,
Robbie



humbly thanking God today for forgiveness
for the shoes on the front porch
for the dog slobber on my glass doors
for the flowers that are blooming
for the toothpaste on the bathroom mirrors
for the teenagers unmade beds
for a husband who loves me