Many Christians choose to fast during the lent season......but now I am learning that the focus should not be on depriving yourself of something as it should be on devoting yourself to YHWH......
Found this amazing book on Ann Voskamp's blog site....(a woman who has been used by God to change my life)..........more than she will ever know....whispering gently thank you God for Ann..........................
Taking in the cross....the grief........the crucifixion.....looking at my own life a friend and betrayal.....Oh how I am so much like the Peter....(all passion and no commitment)......ready...ready... to cut the ear off of anyone who messes with YHWH....
broken YES....desensitized YES with all the suffering in this mess we call life.....
Where is the beauty for ashes? Where is the beauty in suffering? Are we truly mourning? mourning the death that our very own sin has caused? Are we seeing our spirituality in things that are instant gratification? Living in a world that's all about tickle your ear the feel good kind of religion? That "new age," kind of religion........
"All of God's plans have the mark of the cross on them, and all His plans have DEATH to SELF in them.....-E.M. Bounds (1835-1913)
Lent is truly one of my favorite times; because it directs my attention toward my sin and God's grace........................................
This season has had a POWERFUL...effect on my personal walk with Jesus......Scripture is the heart of what I am doing......made a very hard decision to put seminary on hold for a while....crushed me hard.Wanting change from deep...down to the core of who I am......
Oh how the blood...deals with me.........and that old rugged cross shows the real me...the ugly me................
I am always telling Amy; "We are our own worst enemies!" how true that rings.....how clever we are at turning everything around and making it all about us!
This lent season has challenged me......led me down a soul searching journey.....praying for three things..
1) Surrender-(how to surrender my mind to God)
2) Self-denial-(wanting to have no room for pride, vain or glory....)
3) Heart-transformation(wanting to be rid of any pride or the wanting of praise)
jumping off that spiritual treadmill...of running in place in my safe little space...of being a good bible student, teacher, speaker, writer.....
laying down the self......
my life is pretty from the outside....but when looking in it becomes the dark night of the soul....one who craves the easy....
one who is the taker instead of the giver.......
one who is lost...
one who is hollow....
one who feeds the flesh......
but.....
one who is seeking that blessed hope...
one who is seeking that glorious appearing of our Great God...
one who is seeking the reality of the cross.....
as I whisper again and again....God's grace, God's grace......more please....more...
I the taker......but one who knows
"my redeemer lives"
and God so graciously whispers into that stone cold heart of mine....
self-denial...........the remedy of it all....that causes MERCY to fall.....
wanting so badly to FALL.....fall into the arms of his grace....
All of grace,
Robbie
